Tag: kindness

Are you really listening?

One of the essential needs of all humans beings is to be heard above being corrected with ‘the right answer’. As subconsciously we equate being heard with being accepted possibly even loved. Yet how often do we actually listen to what someone is saying?

More often than not I find myself thinking about how to solve their problem or, coming up with reasons why I disagree with them or, worse still trying to come up with witty comment so that somehow I still get attention.

Let your mind revisit recent conversations and reflect upon your actions and responses.

When we resist these urges and truly, deeply listen to what is being said we achieve a deeper level of perception where we are able to understand what is being communicated. We enter a new level of connection with the person who is speaking and let them into our heart, the depth of who we are.

We have engaged with their ‘being’ and discovered more about them but in some way we’ve also learnt more about ourselves.

When we are willing to sacrifice ourselves for others, willing to let them into our hearts and get involved in their lives we will both be transformed.

“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”

James 1:19

One Act Of Kindness

‘Love your neighbour as yourself’ is such a well-known adage that we rarely stop to give it a second thought. Yet Jesus placed a lot of emphasis on this truth at times pushing its meaning beyond what some might consider ‘reasonable limits’ by adding, “I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This could cause many of us to question the benefit of doing such a thing, especially for those who are against us!

However Franciscan priest Fr. Richard Rohr offers us the beginnings of an answer when he says, “Until we learn to love others as ourselves, it’s difficult to blame broken people who desperately try to affirm themselves when no one else will.”

The truth is we never fully know another person’s situation or reasons for the way they behave. Most of the time what we perceive as a personal attack is actually the manifestation of that person’s own internal struggle. So by choosing to love others as ourselves, especially those who are against us maybe we can begin to break these ongoing cycles of negativity thus allowing all of us to move closer to a state of inner healing.

“Love your neighbour as yourself.”

Matthew 22:39