Category: Blog

After hearing about the Manchester attack, I was thinking about the growing number of terrorist attacks we are seeing and hearing about these days; there doesn’t seem to be anywhere that is untouched.

[This post seems even more poignant now after the attack at London not 2 days ago. I was writing it as the attacks were happening!]

I find it so sad to see the hurt and pain people are willing to cause each other. Especially when they claim they are doing it in the name of a divine being!

Unfortunately this is a repeating pattern throughout history; people claiming their acts of violence in the name of the divine. Yet underneath this zealous religiosity is normally a more vain, self-centred and very human desire; power.

In complete contrast, what I believe does show something of the divine is the beautiful acts of compassion and kindness that people demonstrate immediately after such monstrous acts are perpetrated.

The way societies minister to each other; the homeless giving first aid support, strangers looking out for strangers and celebrities instantly changing their schedules to put on a massive charity event in support of the people affected. All of the divisions that day-to-day separate us, completely vanish in that instant. Instead of ‘them’ we just see ‘our own’ hurt and in need.

It seems that not only inspite of, but as a direct result of such grotesque acts of violence, beautiful acts of love shine and sparkle all the more in the darkness, bringing people closer together.

That for me is the divine in action.

“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.“

John 1:5

 

No one likes hardship or suffering, yet it is almost inevitable we will experience it.

That may not be an agreeable idea to you because we all have a wired-in fear of hardship and suffering, and rightly so. But maybe, if we sought to change our attitude towards hardship we might begin see it as an opportunity for learning and development. A chance for our roots to grow deeper.

I don’t by any means say that flippantly, like somehow you can click you’re fingers and perceive it differently. Yet by learning to change the language of our internal monologue from negative and pessimistic, to positive and optimistic we can begin to see things differently. (This links back to my post on ‘Being content‘)

Interestingly, however if you look at the biographies of many people, which society would call ‘great’, you will clearly see the thread of suffering and hardship running through their story.

These people would often describe the hardship they endured as being one of the elements that formed, or shaped them as a person.

Nelson Mandela, is a prime example. The hardship and oppression he was born into as a black man in Apartheid South Africa, and his struggle for the freedom of his people, was the furnace that forged him into the inspirational leader he later became.

He came face to face with the ‘evil’ in humanity and could not settle for the injustice he saw around him. In doing so he chose a path of hardship; one that drove him to a deeper way of existing within the storms that beset him. In prison he had space to reflect on this and see the pointlessness of tit-for-tat behaviour.

As such when he was released from prison and became president he was able to lead the people of South Africa forward in reconciliation between prisoners and captors without perpetuating the cycle of hatred and violence that had gone before.

If he hadn’t been forced to search more deeply within himself I don’t think he would have been able to lead the way that he did.

So what are your hardships? Where are you suffering? And how can these uncomfortable moments help you search more deeply within yourself and your world view for a truer way of being?

“We know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”

Romans 5:3-4

‘The Presence’ has many names and is experienced by people in many different ways. Yet what is common in peoples’ references to these indescribable moments is the overwhelming sense of awareness at a deep, ‘soul level’. This can be of peace and ‘at-oneness’, or a jarring and painful experience.

We all experience these moments; they usually seem like an eternity at the time but on reflection were momentary. We are never able fully remember or re-create the essence of that moment.

It could be found in the sight of a beautiful natural vista, in facing the destruction caused by war, in hearing a moving piece of music, in experiencing a loving relationship, in loss felt at the death of one loved , or the awe inspired by gazing at the stars in the night sky. Many moments can bring us to this point of awareness; into ‘The Presence’.

These moments profoundly affect us and we have the choice to either engage with them, or pass them by and forget. I believe it is in these epiphanies that we brush up against ‘The Presence’; the essence and meaning of everything that is and it is through engaging with these experiences that we progress in our spiritual journey of development.

Many of us are so busy with ‘everyday’ things that we lose perspective on what it really means to ‘exist’. We become shut off to a broader awareness of what is beyond ourselves. Mindfulness and meditation can serve us well in opening ourselves up again to ‘The Presence’.

For at the fringes of our perception are expansive open spaces that we rarely tread, places where intuition and perception are our guides. These spaces can seem wild and foreign but at the same time familiar. This is where we will find and rest in ‘The Presence’.

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”

Ecclesiastes 3:11

Abraham Lincoln, Ghandi, C. S. Lewis, Lao Tzu.

These are but a few people who have been able to powerfully speak into society and culture, bringing about change.

If you look back at their lives you will notice a recurring theme; they learnt from the collective wisdom of humanity through wide study and reading. They were also influenced by engagement with their contemporaries and the spiritual wisdom of their own belief system. In doing so they were able to discern lessons and principles that they applied to their time.

It is worth pointing out that by ‘collective wisdom’ I mean to describe wisdom, from both our forebears; those who have walked the path before us, and our contemporaries; the fellow pilgrims we share this journey with.

Our development depends on us not missing what is being revealed, nor being so arrogant as to assume that we know better than those before us. It is vital that we make use of this collective wisdom lest it be lost, or forgotten.

Accessing ‘collective wisdom’, however requires us to be willing to learn from others, which is easier said than done.

Learning from others, requires us to think of them and their truths as highly as we think of ourselves and our truths. This necessitates not only humility but courage to let our defences down and  be open to being  influenced by them.

This vulnerablity with others opens up the possibility of being hurt; and herein lies the real challenge to our spiritual development.

…..

“What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done; there is nothing new under the sun.“

Ecclesiastes 1:9

What is it to be content, or find contentment?

A number of questions spring; Is it internally or externally gained? Is it physical or spiritual in nature? Is it an emotion or a choice?

All too often contentment is confused with happiness and joy. However joy and happiness are emotions that well up within us, we feel them – when you are reunited with a close relative or friend after a long period of time. But like all emotions they waiver and fade, soon replaced by others.

Many spiritual traditions describe contentment as a state of being, one that is achieved by making peace with your situation and circumstances. To me this describes something deeper than emotions, which can be as changeable as the wind.

We are rarely in control of the circumstances of life and the ocean of our emotions can go from idyllically calm to sickeningly tumultuous in the blink of an eye. Yet if we exist at deeper level, beneath the waves, we can be content regardless of the raging storms above.

This in no way means we shouldn’t feel our emotions, for it is both natural and healthy to fully do so. What it does mean, is that we are not controlled and derailed by them. Instead we choose how to respond to them. Achieving this state of being is the work of a lifetime, and for it to be habitual, it must be practised in both the highs, and the lows of our journey.

A simple practice that can be used as a beginning is developing at an attitude of gratitude, by meditating on what you are thankful for. A focus on what is good enables us to resist becoming fixated on the things that are troubling us. Rather than avoiding them we are able put them into perspective in such a way that allows us to begin working through them on our own terms.

“Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honourable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.“

Philippians 4:8

It sounds clichéd doesn’t it! However in reality most people spend large portions of their lives trying to ‘find themselves’, and where they ‘fit’, or ‘belong’. Feeling like you have found yourself, I believe is strongly linked to having purpose.

A ‘calling‘ can be defined as, ‘a strong impulse or inclination towards a particular way of life, activity or career, or vocation.‘

Yet it can be difficult to figure out what that might be. There are so many conflicting views on what validates calling. Increasingly in our consumer-driven society the validation is based around whether it will bring acknowledgement and be profitable. Neither of which I feel are helpful in this process.

Why is finding my calling, or purpose important?

A calling at its heart it is the thing or things that in doing you feel most deeply fulfilled and realised as a person. I remember a quote that puts it like this:

‘Work should be as close as possible to the fulfilment of our natures and the expression of our divine creativeness – work shall be such as a man or woman may do it with their whole heart, and that they shall do it for the very work’s sake.‘

It provides us with purpose, meaning and ultimately self-acceptance which in turn empowers us to accept and honour others.

How do I find my calling?

There are many different ways you could discern what your calling is. I offer one method which I found useful and have adapted slightly from the author Stephen Covey in his book ‘The seven habits of highly effective people’.

I have adapted this exercise into a meditation which may help you to begin to engage with those thoughts and feelings at the centre of your being. It will help you imagine outside of your false self or ego allowing you to be vulnerable with yourself.

In the process, my hope is that you will learn to be gracious towards yourself, whilst at the same time realising areas within your sphere of influence, that you have power to proactively make positive changes in.

What do I do once I’ve found my calling?

Live it out, pursue it and let it transform your entire being, your outlook, your politics, your relationships and your society. Be an example of it to others and guide them to their own journey of self-discovery.

The Meditation

You need to invest good amount of time in this as there will be a lot of information brought up that you will need to process. Make notes as you go along and feel free to break the meditation up into sections if that works best for you.

Setting the scene 

Imagine you live a long and successful life. on your 100th birthday your family organise a surprise party for you. There are people invited from all the different areas of your life. Imagine the colours, the smells, the excitement and happiness in that space.

All these people are here to honour you and express their love and appreciation for you and your life.

During the party 4 people from different areas of your life get up to give a speech about you; someone from your family, someone from your friendship group, someone from your work and someone from a community project that you have been involved in.

Visualisation

Spend some time thinking about what you would want each of these people to say about you.

• Your family – what would you want them to say about you? what were you like as a spouse, a parent, a brother or sister, a relative? Your character? Your motivations? Your gifts and talents?

 

• Your friend – what would you want them to say about you? what were you like as a friend? Your character? Your motivations? Your gifts and talents?

 

• Your work colleague – what would you want them to say about you? what were you like as a work colleague, an employee? Your character? Your motivations? Your gifts and talents?

 

• Someone you volunteered with – what would you want them to say about you? what were you like as a community member, a volunteer? Your character? Your motivations? Your gifts and talents?

Reflection 1

Once you have gone through the above series of visualisations get some paper and write down the thoughts and feelings that came to your through the exercise. It could be for example a list of key words that describe you, activities or areas you feel passionate about.

Reflection 2

Then think about your life today, are you living in a way that expresses these goals? What if anything is preventing you from those goals? How? Why?

What now?

Over the next few days and weeks think through these things and begin to look at ways in which you can proactively begin to make changes within yourself, changes of focus or attitude that will enable you to move forwards.

Realise that all change has to begin within you. However, it may well be helpful to talk with a trusted friend about this process. If you are seeking to make changes ask this person to help keep you accountable, by regularly asking you how you are getting on with them.

 

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.“

Jeremiah 29:11

Why do I need to find a quite space?

If I do not reflect, I lose touch with myself and the patterns I am living in. I risk making the same mistakes over again, I risk not learning and progressing. It is necessary at regular intervals to stop and take stock, reflect on where I am and question my own paradigm (the way I view the world and life) against reality.

A quote that really helped me to engage with idea was this;

‘You don’t see the world as it is, you see it as you are.’ – Stephen Covey

Not only did this statement get me thinking about how narrow my own understanding of the world could be, it also showed me that the views of others may be equally narrow. As such we have a lot that we can learn from each other, with insights that can help others reveal and undermine unhealthy and destructive paradigms – bringing about healing and wholeness.

But is it that easy? How do I begin to reflect on my way of viewing the world? I just do it, there isn’t a lot of thought that goes into it. Isn’t it more instinctual than premeditated?

How do I go about it?

Personally this is where meditation and mindfulness come into the equation. Self-reflection brings awareness and clarity to how I am ‘operating’ day-to-day. It requires time spent stilling the mind, taking a step back from the constant internal monologue, just being in a moment and doing nothing.

It is worth researching into different aids to meditation and mindfulness. There are a lot of useful resources out there; apps, YouTube videos, etc. I tend to either use slow tempo instrumental music, or go outside, or just look out the window at the sky. Whilst doing this I focus on taking slow deep breaths in and out through my mouth as this helps to slow my mind down and make me more aware of my body.

Staying in this state of stillness for a period of time allows me to more effectively reflect on myself afterwards. It can be useful to have a notepad in which you write down things that have become clear to you and try to keep a journal over several months. This will be useful to look back over periodically and notice any patterns in thought processes; thus further aiding you in your self-reflection.

Remember there are no simple, quick routes to understanding your thoughts and patterns of behaviour, it takes time and attention. What I am describing here is in itself the beginning of a new pattern for life that gives space for development.

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.“

Proverbs 4:23

What can nature teach us about life and spirituality?

Nature has such a powerful affect on our mind and soul. It connects with something deep within us beyond words, and yet at times seems to be so at odds with the culture and society that we live in.

I don’t know about you but at least once every day (often more than once) I find myself wondering why life is so frenetic; whether it is the constant drive for efficiency and effectiveness in work, the seeming inability to be out of contact with other people for any length of time, or the feeling that I need to be successful and achieve something amazing.

It is this feeling and the associated frustration it generates that caused me to search more deeply for meaning and purpose within life. Through this searching I began to spend more time in isolation, meditating on both sacred scriptures and my thoughts and feelings trying to find some light.

It was during this time that I learnt some profound lessons from nature. Most things in nature take place in a slow and deliberate way, so slow sometimes that it can seem nothing purposeful is happening. Yet very little in nature happens without a purpose. This I believe is the first lesson I learned; when it seems as if nothing is happening in life, rather maybe, it is happening slowly requiring more patience.

The second lesson I have learned from nature is to notice the patterns in life. Nature is rhythmic and cyclical; the seasons, the lunar cycle, the tides, the menstrual cycle all involve repetition and follow a rhythm. By slowing down and becoming more aware of the ‘seasons of life’, remembering that each season is temporary and will pass in time, I am more able to weather the storms that come my way.

The third thing I have learned from nature is the innate wisdom of self-acceptance it possesses. Things in nature don’t strive to be anything other than what they are. Take a tree, it does not try to be more like a mountain because it is a tree. It seems to be a very human condition to strive to be something or someone else, rather than being the best version of me that I can be. It is easy never to feel content by striving to be something we are not, rather than investing time in understanding who and what we are as an individual.

“But ask the animals, and they will teach you, or the birds in the sky, and they will tell you; or speak to the earth, and it will teach you, or let the fish in the sea inform you.“

Job 12-7-8

Definition of ‘plane’: Level of existence, thought or development.

We are all connected by a thread, some would call it divine, others the universe, or maybe love. Whatever the name, this notion of interconnectedness gives us a rich viewpoint from which to observe the life we find ourselves in.

In sharing my own journey; the meanderings, the mistakes and the lessons I hope to learn. Giving myself permission to ask questions of my spiritual journey, questions that open up the possibility of new understandings and growth. And if you are hear reading this then I hope it does the same for you.

Welcome.

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